Purposeful Wanderings - Bradford L. Glass - September 2024
“When you follow a set of tracks back to its maker, you unravel the mystery of its life story.” – Tom Brown, animal tracker
We come from a long line of storytellers. Story was central to the lives of our early ancestors. Not only did it serve to bind individual and community, story carried meaning – from person to person, generation to generation. Story also offers us a path to make sense of ourselves, our lives and our place in the world. If stories form the threads of our experience, then the fabric they weave is the landscape on which we live. Storytelling has become rather a lost art these days, however, living as we do in world that doesn’t want us to slow down enough for the inquiry and reflection that storytelling invites. Perhaps it’s time to rekindle this art.
Have you ever thought of your life as a story? You’re the star in your story … and you’re also its author. Each day you write a new chapter – by how you choose to live your life. Stop for a minute and ask yourself a few questions: What’s the story my life has become? Where did the story come from? Is it true? Do the lines I write each day come from my deepest dreams? Or am I rewriting yesterday one day at a time? Or living someone else’s story instead of my own? Will my story sustain me for a lifetime? If your answers feel unsettling, maybe it’s time to change the script. It’s your life! As author, you hold that power.
An old saying suggests, “If you don’t want much from life, you don’t have far to go.” Most seem content with this (or at least live as if they were). But if you aspire to something greater – to live more authentically, to communicate more effectively, to develop new competence, to create meaning, to experience freedom and peace – I’m here to help you draft a new chapter. I’ll help you discover your stories; I’ll help you spot the illusion – stories that belong to others – so you can listen only to your own. Your life doesn’t hold you back … trying to live someone else’s does! Together, we’ll create a path to your unique truth … your limitless potential.
It doesn’t matter if you don’t know how … or if you don’t know where the path leads. You only need to be willing to step into uncharted territory, willing to be changed by what you learn, willing to challenge conventional thinking … so you can live your own instead. Your truth has always been inside you … inviting you to design your life around its message. Perhaps its voice is quiet. Or life’s noise keeps you from hearing it. Maybe you’ve heard it yet ignored it. Yet just imagine what it would be like to honor that voice each day! There’s a story worth living!
I won’t suggest an exercise for a client unless I’ve done it done myself. I’ve looked at my life as a story. The inquiry has been not only fascinating, but insightful, meaningful and evocative. Seeing my life as a story has helped me explain so many of life’s mysteries – like “why in the world did I do that!?” By following the threads of my stories back to their “makers” (lessons, beliefs, assumptions and experiences that cemented them inside me as “truth”), I’ve made sense of myself, my life, my place in the world … and my reason for being here. I know now that just by accepting and believing early lessons, I ended up living someone else’s life … for decades. And I know now that by being shaken from this unconscious slumber by a few caring others, I was able to change the course of my life … and write a new story, a story that is authentically mine.
Oh yes, the real me? The sacred ground that stirs my heart and soul lies in curiosity about life’s mystery and meaning – how and why life works … in the cosmos, in nature, in human consciousness. By unraveling the threads of chaos that appear on the surface as “life,” I find the clarity of its underlying order and its unity … and then create “conversations” that help others discover and live their mystery and meaning.
So give your life some thought – as a story. If you’re living someone else’s, is that ok with you? If you want to write a new chapter – or perhaps even a new story – you have that power. If you’re not the author of your life story, then you’re just playing a part … but it’s someone else’s part. Game on.
Exercise: My “resumé story” may tell an appealing tale, yet it’s nothing more than the trail of breadcrumbs I’ve left behind while trying to find my way in life. My journey is my own, yet I’m not alone. My hope is that offering a glimpse into my story may serve as an invitation … for you to find … and write … your own!
Recalling life as a young adult, over 50 years ago now, what I wanted was to live my truth, with meaning, freedom, joy. What I got was struggle. What I did when things got tough was fight back, try harder, “fix” stuff, blame others. What I assumed was that it was all normal, “the way life is,” that I was playing my role as I’d come to know it. Why wouldn’t I? It’s what I learned. I learned life is difficult. I learned to stay in control. I learned if I’m not busy, I’m lazy. I learned I had to get things right in order to be lovable. And I learned that others learned this too, so I’d better learn to compete.
Only after 30 years of stress did I realize what I’d missed – “life” didn’t cause my struggle; believing what I’d learned did. Because the effect (my struggles) and its cause (old experiences) were separated in time by 50 years, I couldn’t imagine, so therefore denied, that I’d created it all myself. And why wouldn’t I deny it? I never learned anything else! OK, I “got a lot done” then; but I wonder how things might have been – for me, others, those I loved – had I not misidentified the enemy as being outside me. That one thought of denial – it’s only a thought – was the biggest obstacle I faced to the meaning, peace, freedom and joy I longed for … and fought all the wrong things to achieve. My thoughts showed up as “voices in my head,” so I listened to them, assuming they were my own. They weren’t. These thoughts led me down a dead-end street. Worse, it was someone else’s street.
Thanks to a few caring (and persistent) others, and thanks to a few big losses in life (which I detested at the time), I learned to look inside for answers (where they’d always lived) and not outside (where I was taught to look). Had I learned early in life to find, then trust, the voice of my inner truth instead of what others thought I should believe, I might never have lost the childlike wonder and curiosity that light my path again today, 50+ years later. I’m grateful for the journey.
Life Lessons from Nature: (A repeat, but fits perfectly here, and it’s a favorite.) If you’ve been to Maui, or even if you haven’t, you likely know of the drive to Hana. Hana is a small town on the less traveled side of the island, where a combination of trade winds and mountains brings a fair amount of rain. Lightly populated as a result, life proceeds at a slower pace here, as if clocks ran at a different speed. The drive is just over 30 miles, with some 160 hairpin turns along the way. If, like many tourists, you set a goal to go to Hana, the trip could take perhaps 2 hours, leaving you with white knuckles, mild perspiration, a feeling of torture, and letdown on arrival – there’s just not much there. If, on the other hand, like fewer tourists, you set out for the experience, what unfolds is far different: spectacular sea cliffs, verdant rainforest, splendid tropical flowers, ancient Hawaiian taro farms, breathtaking silence, the smell of moist earth, and a feeling of the age-old pulse of life itself. If your only objective was to get there, you miss all this. The road to Hana is a metaphor for life, a metaphor for possibility, an example of “story” as well. Whether it’s Hana, or life – to focus only on the destination denies the joy and fulfillment of the experience. It’s the same with goals, too. To declare a goal upfront (one right answer) seems to preclude the experience of the journey (the opening to many answers). It’s the same road whether you experience torture or awe! A choice.
Challenge: How often do forsake the experience of the journey for the “promise” of the destination? When you “get there,” what do you do the day after? If you dared to look back, what can you now see that you missed along the way? What if you could allow life simply to unfold, letting yourself be guided by the natural feedback you get from the process of listening? What possibilities may be there, just past the need to “know the answer?” Let go. Stop missing so much. Possibility is what unfolds while you’re on the way to wherever you think you’re going.
Openings to New Possibility -- at The Road Not Taken: Check out my website www.roadnottaken.com for ideas, articles, newsletters, my books for sale … as well as an invitation to personalized life coaching. If you’re ready to write a new chapter in your life story (or maybe even a new story), I’m here to help; together we’ll chart a course into the unknown territory of your greatest potential. An introductory conversation might just change your life.
And announcing two workshop offerings, both at the Center for Spiritual Journey in Chatham here on Cape Cod. (1) I’m leading a coaching group, four Fridays, 12:00 – 1:30, every other week, starting October 4th. Join fellow travelers to explore the potential your life holds. (2) I’m one of 8 presenters – the last in an 8-week program on Soul Care – on nurturing the multidimensional nature of your being. Mine is entitled, Choosing Your Path Forward. Weekly, Zoom, 6:30-8:00pm, Sept 19th – Nov 14th (no mtg Oct 31st).